Intro
Conflict is not a problem.
The real problem is distorted action within it.
In the previous episodes, I developed a model of action based on six concepts.
Zanshin is a state of awareness and the starting point. Self-control is action grounded in this awareness—not driven by internal impulse, but adapted to a situation. Discipline stabilizes self-control over time.
These three concepts form the foundation of the system. The remaining three shape its practical application.
Compassion means seeing others without projecting emotional states onto them. Responsibility is the moment when we recognize that we are committed to action. Respect guides our action. It means allowing or supporting others to grow according to their inner nature.
This system, grounded in martial arts experience, is not a code of conduct. It is a model of correct action.
Now we should ask: what happens when this structure encounters resistance?
This brings us to the concept of conflict.
1. Conflict Is Not Violence
As a martial artist and a philosopher, I deal with both physical and intellectual conflicts.
However, it may be argued that conflicts in martial arts and philosophy are not real conflicts. They take place in controlled environments. Real fights and real arguments in everyday life are very different.
This is true. However, the difference lies not in the essence of conflict, but in the level of violence involved.
Conflict is a situation in which we encounter opposition while trying to realize our aims. This may happen when goals diverge, structures collide, or action encounters resistance.
Conflict is unavoidable in life. Even refusing conflict is already a response to it. Therefore, the problem is not how to eliminate conflict completely. The problem is how to act correctly within it.
Violence, on the other hand, unlike conflict, is not a situation. It is a form of behavior—an act intended to harm someone physically or mentally.
Therefore, conflict and violence are not the same.
Conflict without violence is possible. For example, proponents of different philosophical theories may remain in conflict while proposing contradictory solutions to the same intellectual problem.
Violence without conflict is also possible. A school bully may completely overpower a victim who offers no resistance. Where there is no resistance, there are no sides in conflict—only a perpetrator and a victim.
So conflict and violence are not identical.
2. Reaction and Response
Violence triggers emotions such as fear, anger, or humiliation. Therefore, the higher the level of violence, the easier it becomes for emotions to distort perception.
As a result, instead of responding to the actual situation, we react to our internal states. Driven by uncontrolled emotions, the structure of action may collapse. Therefore, the basis of functioning within conflict is learning how to work with emotions.
Martial arts and philosophical debate, because of their relatively low level of violence, create a kind of laboratory of conflict. In controlled environments, where conflict is partially separated from its distorting factors, it becomes easier to maintain discipline and self-control.
Consequently, it becomes easier to train zanshin.
Zanshin is the state of awareness that creates distance from emotions, allowing response instead of blind reaction.
In the episode on emotions, I described three ways of working with them. These same modes also apply to conflict situations.
The first way is to consciously allow emotions to drive action. This may be risky. It can easily slide into violence and generate even stronger emotional distortion. Nevertheless, such a strategy may sometimes be appropriate.
For example, in a fight—a direct physical conflict—we usually need some degree of aggression. There is no such thing as a completely non-aggressive punch or kick. Even in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, control is often established through pain.
Similarly, in everyday life, anger may sometimes be appropriate. Anger can indicate that someone has crossed our boundaries and that further discussion is no longer possible.
The second way is to let emotions pass without suppressing them.
This begins with recognizing emotions clearly instead of reacting automatically to them. Recognition itself often weakens emotional pressure and allows action despite internal states.
This is especially important in stressful situations such as competition, where emotions must be acknowledged without taking control of action.
However, some situations are overpowering. Simply accepting emotions may not be enough. Therefore, it is useful to prepare for conflict in advance.
This is the third strategy: cognitive reappraisal. Philosophical and martial arts training both prepare us for conflict by reframing how we perceive such situations.
Through training, we begin to perceive conflict more like a structured game. We perceive the opponent’s actions as a sequence of moves rather than chaotic force.
This makes the situation more comprehensible and allows more accurate action.
Zanshin, however, remains necessary throughout the entire process. It maintains proper distance and protects rational action from emotional distortion.
In the end, thanks to zanshin, we stop being reactive and become responsive.
3. Violence and Avoidance
Every conflict situation activates the fight-or-flight response. These two extremes form a spectrum within which most conflict behavior takes place.
On one side lies uncontrolled violence. This is where someone attempts to destroy an opponent at any cost.
There are situations where such behavior may be justified. But these are extreme cases—situations in which we encounter the same level of violence directly threatening our lives.
On the other side lies uncontrolled avoidance. This is where someone attempts to escape conflict at any cost.
There are also situations where such behavior may be justified. If we are certain that resistance will only result in death, avoidance may become the only rational option.
Most ordinary situations lie between these extremes.
In such situations, violence creates excess of action. Avoidance creates absence of necessary action.
Naturally, each person tends to move more strongly toward one of these directions. Therefore, maintaining the proper structure of action often requires correcting ourselves.
These tendencies manifest themselves emotionally. Therefore, maintaining distance from emotions becomes essential. This is why training in zanshin is fundamental.
Through zanshin—the state of awareness—we notice what emotions indicate to us without blindly following them. This creates freedom in choosing how to act.
This enables self-control. From the state of awareness, we become capable of acting according to the situation rather than according to internal states. Discipline stabilizes this action over time, gradually internalizing the correct structure.
Zanshin, self-control, and discipline form the foundation of the system. They create the basic structure of correct action.
Now it becomes important to examine how the remaining concepts apply within conflict.
4. Compassion Within Conflict
Compassion becomes especially difficult during conflict. When we encounter resistance while trying to realize our aims, it becomes easy to perceive others merely as obstacles or enemies.
Nevertheless, zanshin helps preserve compassion and interrupts emotional distortion.
First, it allows us to see others more clearly, rather than through the lens of emotional projection.
This is because compassion is not an emotion. It is understanding others within the context of a broader situation. Therefore, it becomes easier to respond according to the situation itself rather than react emotionally.
This reduces excess in action. Our movements become more precise and more appropriate to particular circumstances.
This idea appears clearly in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu terminology. A fight is often called a game, and practitioners are called players. This is a very useful analogy.
Second, compassion prevents us from sliding into violence. Understanding another person as a human being shaped by their broader life situation creates distance from their aggression.
Imagine that someone verbally attacks you by calling you useless. Most people respond to such emotional violence with further violence.
But imagine understanding that the person became a workaholic because of suffering in their private life. Would you react in the same way?
Probably not.
Understanding the situation itself creates distance from aggression.
5. Conflict and Respect
Compassion alone, however, is not enough. Another concept from my model becomes necessary here: respect.
Acting respectfully requires two things.
First, we must understand others as living beings.
A plant grows by adapting to its environment. The same applies to people. Human beings also struggle to preserve and develop their potential within changing circumstances. Their actions emerge from this struggle.
Second, respectful action means allowing, protecting, or supporting growth according to one’s inner nature.
This applies both to others and to ourselves. We must protect our inner nature just as we protect a plant from harmful conditions.
Avoidance becomes a mistake because it allows others to cross our boundaries. Repeated situations of this kind—such as bullying or domestic violence—damage growth across time.
Violence is also a mistake. It is often driven by fear that someone might hurt us. As a result, violence may become an attempt to harm others in advance, before any real boundary has been crossed.
Conflict reveals itself at the level of boundaries.
We must prevent others from crossing our boundaries without crossing theirs in return.
This is difficult, and we should not pretend otherwise. Conflict situations easily deteriorate either into domination of an overly avoidant person or into mutual violence.
Nevertheless, according to my model, we should still attempt to act correctly.
Compassion does not mean weakness or agreement. It means perceiving another person as they actually are. Without this, proportionate action becomes impossible.
6. Responsibility Within Conflict
We should act respectfully toward ourselves and others. But how do we recognize situations in which action becomes necessary?
This is where responsibility appears.
Responsibility means recognizing that action is required from us. It is neither a feeling nor a duty imposed externally. Responsibility emerges from objective circumstances themselves. It does not depend on our emotions or on social expectations.
So how do we recognize such situations?
I would argue that whenever the protection or development of someone’s inner nature depends on us, responsibility emerges.
A simple example is caring for a plant. Its growth depends on us, and therefore we become responsible for acting appropriately.
This is why responsibility toward children is fundamental. But the same principle applies more broadly: whenever another being’s development genuinely depends on our action, responsibility emerges.
We are also responsible for ourselves. For example, self-destructive behavior harms our own growth.
Once responsibility appears, how should we act?
Respectfully.
This means supporting growth—or at least not interfering with development.
The same principle applies to conflict.
If our boundaries are crossed and our inner nature is threatened, conflict may become unavoidable. Avoiding such situations often means allowing harm to continue.
This is precisely where responsibility emerges.
The situation commits us to act.
7. Martial Arts and Conflict
Martial arts are often misunderstood.
Some people see them as systems of violence. Others interpret them as systems of peace.
Both views are insufficient because they describe opposite extremes: violence and avoidance.
In my view, martial arts are systems of functioning under pressure.
Their purpose is not aggression, but neither is it passivity.
Proper martial arts training develops the abilities described in this model.
First, it trains zanshin: awareness and clear perception. Some martial arts, such as iaido or kyudo, place particular emphasis on this dimension.
Second, martial arts train emotional regulation and self-control. Training sessions become environments for practicing different ways of working with emotions, especially under pressure.
Third, martial arts cultivate discipline through repeated action and long-term commitment.
The remaining concepts—compassion, responsibility, and respect—also find practical application within martial arts training.
Together, these elements create a structure for functioning within conflict.
Therefore, martial arts are not systems of violence and not systems of peace.
They are systems of correct action under pressure.
And ultimately, martial arts—like philosophy—teach one more thing:
There is no development without conflict.
We must struggle both with others and with ourselves. Only then can the structure of action be tested and refined.
8. Conflict on the Path
Now let us move to a more general level.
The continuous realization of this structure over time is what I call a path.
Different forms of conflict appear along this path. Some emerge during sparring or competition. Others arise in everyday life.
But the most persistent conflict is always the conflict with ourselves.
Martial arts demand consistent practice despite momentary impulses, emotions, fatigue, or distraction. Discipline must be maintained despite changing internal states.
Training therefore reveals our internal fragmentation:
impulsiveness,
fear,
instability,
and emotional reactivity.
To remain on the path, we must learn to work with these conditions rather than blindly follow them.
This is why motivation alone is insufficient.
In fact, the days when we are not motivated are often the most important ones.
Maintaining the correct structure of action despite lack of motivation reveals what the path actually means.
That is real training.
Because in the end, maintaining the structure is everything.
Outro
This was the Budo Mind Podcast.
In this episode, I examined conflict as an unavoidable part of life both inside and outside the dojo.
First, I distinguished conflict from violence. Conflict is a situation in which action encounters resistance, while violence is a form of harmful behavior.
Then, I distinguished reaction from response. Reaction is impulsive behavior driven by emotional states. Response emerges from zanshin—the state of awareness.
I also described violence and avoidance as two opposite distortions of action.
Violence creates excess of action by crossing boundaries aggressively. Avoidance creates absence of necessary action by allowing boundaries to be crossed.
Next, I examined conflict through the practical concepts of the system.
Compassion allows us to perceive another person clearly rather than through emotional projection. Respect guides action toward protection and support of growth. Responsibility emerges when a situation commits us to act.
Finally, I argued that martial arts are neither systems of violence nor systems of peace.
They are systems of correct action under pressure.
Because conflict reveals whether this structure truly exists.
